Break Down the Walls
by Miyuki Wynter
Summary: Izaya is pulled off the streets by a client after revenge. At the same time, Shizuo hears some strange noises and decides to intervene. Shizaya. Contains non-con.
1. Chapter 1

**I'm back with another fic! This one won't be very long, but it's something at least! (I just wanted to mess up Izaya again. I have a problem with that.) **

**WARNING: This fic contains malexmale non-con (non-consensual sex, aka: rape) **

…~-~…

He didn't make a sound when they had surrounded him.

He didn't make a sound when two or three grabbed hold of him from behind.

Even as they dragged him, struggling against their grip on his limbs and neck, he remained silent.

He knew what they wanted. They wanted to make him scream. They wanted to make him beg them to stop and let him go.

He wouldn't give them the privilege of hearing that.

Of course he wanted to get away. Of course he was terrified thinking about what they were about to do to him. Would they torture him? _Kill_ him?

He knew he had to get away, and even though he knew they probably enjoyed the way he struggled in their grasp, that was the one thing he couldn't avoid.

However he refused to scream.

The streets were empty anyway. The rain forced all of his lovely humans to hide away and wait for it to stop.

It was the perfect time to ambush someone alone on the streets. No one would see.

Even if he were to scream until his voice died out, no one would hear him. The rain would drown his cries out.

If he wasn't afraid for his life, he would have congratulated these men for a job well done.

He winced as he was forcefully thrown against the back wall of the alley, his head smacking into the wet brick with a dull thud. His vision blanked for a moment as he felt himself being pressed to the wall by two larger men while the other two tied his arms behind his back.

He wondered for a moment why they didn't tie his legs as well, that is, until he was forced to his knees while a cold hand worked its way under the front of his shirt.

The realization hit him hard and sparked a new adrenaline in him as he quickly got his balance and stood up forcefully slamming the man behind him into the wall. The instant those hands were off of him, he bolted, not thinking twice about how he was going to untie himself. That was something he could figure out later. He needed to _move_.

"Shit!" he heard one of the men yell behind him.

Izaya was nearly at the entrance to the alley when a solid form collided with him from behind, tackling him to the cold, wet ground. Pain shot up his leg as he realized that the impact must have caused him to roll on his ankle. Even if he managed to get out of their grasp again, he wouldn't be able to run fast enough anymore.

He was trapped.

And even though he knew it was completely futile, he continued to struggle against the larger man's grip.

"Just knock him out or something, jeeze!" another man said brazenly.

"Where's the fun in that?" a much cooler and calmer voice responded, "He won't learn his lesson if he's not awake for the punishment."

_He must be the leader…_ Izaya thought, mustering up the harshest glare possible before turning to examine the man's face.

He recognized it, remembering the picture at the top of the file. This man was in with the yakuza. He recalled watching this man's wife sobbing in his office as Izaya told her that yes, her husband had indeed been seeing other women. Five others to be exact.

Yet in this instant, he could not recall the man's name, or other personal information. The others around him were all new faces to Izaya's memory.

"Ooo that's a scary look," the man sang, kneeling down next to Izaya.

He stopped struggling as the man looked him in the eyes. There was an eerie calm in the air for a moment in which he felt the weight on top of him lighten, but the hands remained holding him tightly.

A few others grabbed him and dragged him back against the wall, forming a blockade around him before releasing him from their grip.

Izaya looked around for something, _anything_ he could use to get out of here, but the walls were blank and flat, and the back of the alley was clear of any trash. He thought it to be strange for only an instant until his brain filled in the blanks.

"You've been planning this for a while, haven't you?" Izaya finally spoke, his voice much stronger than he thought it was going to be, "This place was cleared out before we even got here."

"We couldn't have you using anything to escape, now could we?" The man said with a sinister grin, "My wife left me, you know."

"With how much she was crying in my office I can't say I'm surprised," Izaya said calmly, "Oh by the way, you owe me a new handkerchief for that."

"Don't you realize you're in no position to crack jokes, Orihara?" he said shaking his head.

Izaya shrugged as best as he could manage. "It was worth a try, I suppose."

A sharp kick sent Izaya back to the ground, his clothing now completely soaked through. He shivered slightly, but did not make any attempt to pull himself up again. At this point, it would probably only lead to another kick.

The man then grabbed a fistful of wet ebony hair, pulling harshly so Izaya was looking at his face once again.

"I loved my wife," he spat, "It's your fault she left me. I bet you did this on purpose! You wanted to take her from me! With a pretty little face like that, I'm sure you could have any woman you wanted, you little fucker."

"Women like her are not my type," Izaya responded before he could stop himself, "And if you really loved her the way you say you do, you wouldn't have been seeing five others at the same time. But you see, this is why I love humans so much! Humans don't ever stop to appreciate what they have until it's gone! All they want is more and more!"

"Shut your trap now, or I'll shut it for you, _kid_," the man sneered, "You don't like women like her, huh? A beautiful woman like that should excite the envy of every man! That is unless they're not into women if you know what I mean."

Izaya instinctively tried to back away when the man's face grew close enough for Izaya to smell the faint traces of alcohol on his breath.

"And if _that's_ the case with you, then you're going to _love_ what I came up with for a fitting punishment," he whispered.

A cold hand reached for the hem of Izaya's shirt, gently lifting it out of the way as ice-cold fingertips trailed up from his stomach to his chest. Izaya couldn't stop the shiver that went through his body at the feeling of those frozen fingers against his already cool skin.

"Now then," he began, "let's get started."

There were laughs around him and the sound of clinking as two of them immediately began unbuckling their belts. The remaining two kneeled own and began working at Izaya's belt.

He wanted to scream for help, but whether it was pride or denial of his attacker's pleasure, he remained silent as he attempted to curl into a ball to escape the prying hands. It was his best option for defense. With his injured ankle, it wasn't likely he'd be able to land a solid kick on both of them before the others could attack.

It wasn't until hands forced him down and stretched his legs out that he began to panic. He wasn't going to get out of this.

He'd have to let them have their way with him and pray to a god he doesn't believe in that they don't plan to kill him when they're done.

Rough hands began to peel his wet clothing away, leaving his lower half completely exposed. He was flipped over and forced to balance on his knees while his face was pressed into the cement.

He could feel as each of them began to feel up his legs and ass, one of the men daring to smack it not once, but twice while the others laughed.

Izaya tried to hide his face only for the leader of the men to pull his face back up by his chin until his face was at level with the man's erect cock.

"Suck," he demanded, placing something cold and metallic to Izaya's temple, "and don't bite."

Grimacing , Izaya had no choice but to obey, letting the hardened flesh push past his lips while the others continued to caress the rest of his body.

"I suggest you get that good and wet, Orihara."

Nobody had to tell him twice. Izaya sucked and licked at the cock in his mouth, hoping that the sooner he could get this guy off, the sooner they'd leave him alone.

Izaya had let his mind wander away from the scene just long enough to realize that the cock had been removed from his mouth and was now pressed against his entrance. He knew what was next, and tried to go back into his own little world; however, once he felt that hard member force its way past his unwilling muscles, there was nothing that could distract him from the pain that came with penetration.

Biting his lip, Izaya attempted to relax his muscles to lessen the pain before another of the men kneeled in front of him, pressing his disgusting member to Izaya's lips.

"That's it, kid," the man cooed, "get it deep in there…"

Izaya gagged around the cock in his mouth as he was forced to deep-throat it, the owner of it holding his head still as he thrust himself into Izaya's throat.

The men continued to violate him, switching places from fucking his throat to his ass, but when one of them decided to cum in his mouth, Izaya couldn't take it anymore. The bitter taste in combination with the feeling of cum coating the inside of his mouth was too much. As soon as the man pulled out, Izaya's stomach lurched, and emptied itself with a violent shudder.

Vision blurring, Izaya forced himself to stay conscious. Even if slipping into a state of unawareness sounded rather appealing at the moment, fear and survival instinct got the best of him, adrenaline pumping through him to keep him alert.

"You need to learn your place, kid," the leader of the group said, pulling out after a second round.

"Hey!" a new voice jumped in from the entrance of the alley, causing everyone including Izaya to freeze on the spot.

He knew that voice.

_Shizu-chan…?_

…~-~…

**Thank you for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

It was late, and the streets were empty. It was a time Shizuo typically deemed perfect for a walk to clear his head. With the rain, even fewer people were out on the streets, which in turn meant fewer people to potentially piss the blond off.

Yes, he enjoyed the city much more when there wasn't anyone to get in the way.

Shizuo paused at the sight of a brand new advertisement with the name "Hanejima Yuuhei" written along the bottom before something else caught his attention. Through the pattering of the rain in the streets, he could have sworn he heard laughter in the alley next to him.

Curiosity got the better of him; however, he instantly regretted acting on the impulse to peer into the dark space between buildings.

There were five men, and what looked to be another smaller man on the ground. At first glance he'd thought they were part of another gang fight, but upon further inspection, he could see that the two on their knees were definitely _not_ beating someone up.

Shizuo's face burned red when he heard one of the men speak.

"You need to learn your place, kid," he said.

It was the word "kid" that made Shizuo jolt. The men were clearly older than their… victim, but if the person really was just a kid, Shizuo couldn't just walk away.

Peering around the corner once again, Shizuo saw the glint of metal in one man's hand, prompting him to make a move before anything worse happened.

"Hey!" he called, his own voice sounding slightly foreign to his ears. He'd never actually seen anyone being… well… _raped_ before, and stepping in was an entirely strange experience to the blond. But he couldn't just walk away when someone's life could be in danger.

Damn. He really hated violence.

"Who are you?" one of the men still standing blurted out, zipping his pants before turning around.

The others followed suit, including the ones kneeling on the ground, but their victim remained down, his back to Shizuo.

"The name's Heiwajima," he began, hoping that the name alone would be enough to scare them away without a fight, "Heiwajima Shizuo. Maybe you've heard it before."

Bingo.

They all seemed to flinch slightly at his full name. Normally it would hurt him to see the fear in their eyes when he hadn't even threatened them, but tonight he'd rather they just ran away screaming and got it over with.

"W-what are you waiting for?! Get him!" one of the men yelled, holding a gun out in front of him.

The others came at him, but the one with the gun remained still. Shizuo ignored the threat of a gunshot wound (after all, it's nothing he hadn't dealt with before), and picked the first man up by his shirt, throwing him out of the alley and into the street as if he were nothing more than a ragdoll.

The other men stopped in their tracks, holding their arms out and backing away slowly.

"W-wait, don't come any closer," one said, "What do you want…?"

"I want you to get lost," Shizuo stated threateningly, "But if you won't leave on your own, then I'll have to use force. And believe me, you don't want me to have to use force."

Stepping to the side, Shizuo gestured that the path was clear for them to go.

There was a minute of hesitation during which Shizuo feared he might actually have to force them out, until the smallest of the four still left in the alley slowly made his way past, not once taking his eyes off of Shizuo.

"Well…?" Shizuo questioned to the others.

Two more jolted at the question that sounded far too much like a threat, and quickly ran past Shizuo as if they were being chased by a lion. But the man with the gun had a different plan. He ran head on towards Shizuo, aiming the gun at his head.

"I see how it is then," Shizuo mumbled.

Jumping aside, Shizuo managed to grab the man's hand, causing a stray gunshot to fire into the wall where he'd been standing a second ago. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the small man on the ground flinch at the noise.

It was the sudden pity for the victim of these men that had Shizuo tearing the gun from the man's hand and violently throwing him out of the alley so that he collided with the men waiting outside like a bowling ball to the pins. He would have thought it mildly amusing to see them scramble to get off of each other if his worry for the man behind him hadn't been at the front of his mind.

"Get out of here!" he yelled after them as they all finally got to their feet and fled.

When he turned around, he had to pause for a moment. The victim wasn't just any random citizen.

That fur-trimmed jacket tossed to the side and slender form shivering on the ground belonged to none other than Orihara Izaya.

…~-~…

Izaya listened as the leader of the men ran towards Shizuo.

This was his chance. While Shizuo was distracted, he could pull his clothing back on and then hopefully the blond would chase the others away long enough for him to sneak away while he wasn't looking.

Much easier said than done.

Izaya struggled against the rope around his arms to pull together the soaked pieces of his clothing that lay next to him, but if having his hands tied wasn't hard enough, once he managed to grab his boxers with his feet, the wet material clung to itself making it impossible to put on.

The sound of a gunshot caught him off guard, causing him to jump. Sudden fear filled his mind for a moment when he realized that Shizuo might have just been shot. If he was dead, his hope to escape (and most likely to survive as well) had just flown out the window.

Relief filled him when he heard Shizuo yell and the other man scream as he was more than likely thrown out of the alley.

"Get out of here!" he heard Shizuo yell after them.

Damn. He wasn't chasing them after all.

There was no hiding anymore.

Shizuo would see him now, and once he realized who he saved, would probably finish what they started.

He was shivering. Damn it, why was he shivering so much?!

He probably looked pathetic.

"F-flea…?" Shizuo's voice was almost completely drowned out by the rain, "Izaya…? Is that you?"

There was nowhere to run.

Slowly, Izaya pulled himself up so that he was on his knees, with his body facing away from Shizuo to cover himself at least a little bit. Putting on his most confident face, Izaya turned his head and made eye-contact with his nemesis.

"Hello, Shizu-chan," he said as cheerfully as he could. His voice was slightly hoarse, and he couldn't stop the cough that escaped as he finished speaking.

"I… uhh… are you okay?"

Izaya paused.

_Did he really just ask that…?_

"I'm fine," he replied, "although I've been better."

"Okay… um… hold still for a second."

Izaya did as instructed out of curiosity, but the instant he felt a hand on his arm he stiffened, and jerked his arms away.

"What do you think you're doing?" he asked hurriedly.

"Just hold still. I'm untying you."

"Why?" Izaya blurted out before he could stop the word from coming out.

"Well I might not have known that it was you, but I just saved your ass—uhh… kind of literally I guess… So I might as well finish the job…"

"But you _hate_ me," Izaya began, once again unable to stop the words, "I thought once you realized it was me you'd either kill me right then or leave me to die here."

_Shut up before you give him any ideas. _

"Yeah well…" he trailed off, "you must've been scared when you heard me then, huh?"

The words had been mumbled, but it was just loud enough for Izaya to catch.

"I wasn't _scared_," he stated, "I was just waiting for you to take care of them so I could get out of here. I thought you'd chase them down or something, but alas, you're unpredictable as always."

The rope loosened and Izaya pulled his arms over the front of his body and rubbed at his wrists. They'd definitely bruise.

"Whatever, flea," Shizuo said, standing up.

Reaching to his right, Izaya grabbed his wet clothes and tried to pull them on. The fabric was ice cold against his skin, prompting Izaya to shiver even more as he pulled his pants back on.

His hands continued to shake as he pulled up the zipper and somehow managed to button his pants closed. Damn it, why were his hands shaking so much?

Turning around he saw Shizuo glance back at him before extending his hand towards Izaya while continuing to look in the opposite direction.

"Don't," Izaya stated, using the wall as support instead of Shizuo's hand.

His muscles screamed in protest as he stretched out his legs. His knees were weak, his ankle still throbbing along with his head and back. It was cold and painful and all he wanted was to go home and take a shower and sleep.

Still using the wall for support, Izaya took a few small steps, wincing at the pain that shot straight up his spine. And he was still shaking.

He ignored Shizuo's look of concern—because he _must_ be imagining it, Shizuo would _never_ show concern for him—as he continued towards the entrance to the alley.

He was about half way there when he knees buckled, and he tripped, catching himself before he hit the ground.

"_Shit_!" he cursed to himself, almost forgetting that Shizuo was still there, watching.

…~-~…

**Oh my thank you all so much for the reviews :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**Wooo I have to hurry up and finish writing this thing! **

…~-~…

Shizuo didn't know what to say. Orihara Izaya—whom he had never seen at anything below perfect physical condition—was now struggling just to walk a few meters. The blond winced along with Izaya's quiet curses as he continued to drag himself out of the alley.

"I-Izaya, wait," he called after the smaller man who seemed much smaller to him than usual, "let me help you. You can barely walk!"

He reached a hand out only to have it batted away, and his gaze met by an icy glare.

"_Don't_… touch me," Izaya said between breaths.

Shizuo recoiled his hand and continued to watch as Izaya pushed himself to walk on his own. When he reached the opening of the alley, he paused for a moment before letting go of the wall, and continuing on, seemingly with his balance restored. He still limped as he walked though, prompting Shizuo to pick up his umbrella and continue following him.

"Why are you following me?" Izaya blurted out after a few blocks.

Shizuo hesitated for a moment. "I just want to see you get home," he admitted.

Which was true. He couldn't deny that he was worried about Izaya. But what Izaya didn't know was that if Shizuo had seen it was Izaya on the ground in that alley, he probably would have done a lot more damage to those men because…

…Because Heiwajima Shizuo had a secret.

One that he hadn't even fully come to accept yet.

He wasn't sure when it happened, but the raw hatred he had felt for the Flea when they had first met subsided quite a while ago, and soon began to be replaced by somewhat of an attraction. Sure Izaya still pissed him off, but he couldn't deny there was something there that kept him from ever delivering a final blow to the informant—besides moral reasons that is.

He knew that despite his claims, he'd never be able to kill Orihara Izaya.

And now, seeing him like this…

That attraction or whatever it was began to turn into something of possession. Izaya was _his_, and the fact that those men had hurt him made Shizuo's stomach churn. And watching Izaya try to limp his way home sparked a sudden instinct in Shizuo to protect him. He didn't want anything else to happen to Izaya while he was unable to defend himself.

Izaya's scoff brought Shizuo's focus back as he watched the informant continue to pull himself forward. Since there was no vehement denial of his presence, Shizuo decided to continue following him, but at a slight distance behind.

They walked for quite a while, Shizuo wondering just how Izaya was able to push himself this far. They had been passed by a couple of cabs, yet Izaya made no movement to call one. He briefly wondered if maybe those men had mugged him as well.

He sighed, knowing that if that was the case, he didn't have enough money for a cab either. If only Izaya would let Shizuo carry him…

He'd do it just so he didn't have to watch Izaya struggle like this.

"Oi, Flea," Shizuo almost regretted speaking when Izaya visibly flinched at his voice, but continued anyway, "Shouldn't you… go see Shinra or something? You don't look so good."

"I told you I'm fine," Izaya responded without turning back.

They didn't speak at all after that. Shizuo merely continued to follow silently, trying to hold himself back from pulling the informant over his shoulder every time Izaya tripped and needed to hold a wall for support, or slowed his pace to a near stop to catch his breath.

He knew that one wrong move could lead to a meltdown.

Finally Izaya made it back to his apartment building. Shizuo continued to follow him as he dragged himself inside and into the elevator.

To Shizuo's surprise, Izaya didn't say a word in protest when he followed him into the elevator, nor when he continued to follow him to the door.

"Okay, I'm home," Izaya finally said, sounding a bit irritated, "now leave me alone."

But Shizuo barely heard what Izaya had said because he was focused on something else.

Izaya was frighteningly pale.

Shizuo's instincts from taking care of Kasuka as a child suddenly took over as he reached a hand out and placed it on Izaya's forehead.

He was burning up.

Izaya's eyes quickly grew wide, and Shizuo could have sworn he saw a flicker or panic in those eyes before the informant slapped his hand away.

"Don't touch me!" he yelled.

"You have a fever," Shizuo stated, pretending not to notice Izaya's strange behavior.

"So?" he retorted.

"So…" Shizuo clenched his fists to hold back his anger, "it means you've pushed yourself too hard. Let me just take a look at your injuries, and then I'll leave you alone."

A moment of tense silence passed in which the two merely stared at each other; Shizuo waiting for an answer, Izaya struggling to give him one.

"Fine," he mumbled, turning and digging his key out of his pocket.

Shizuo followed him through the door, removing his shoes as he entered.

…~-~…

Izaya sighed as he removed his wet shoes and coat, letting it drop to the floor before wrapping his arms tightly around himself.

He was cold, and he was in pain, and all he could think about was a hot bath and sleeping in his warm bed.

"So your ankle is hurt, isn't it?" Shizuo's words cut into his thoughts, bringing him back to the situation at hand.

"Ah… Y-yeah…"

"Maybe you should sit down in the kitchen or the bathroom," Shizuo suggested, setting his umbrella down next to his shoes, "You're dripping water everywhere."

Looking down, Izaya saw that he was indeed dripping water on the floor, but he couldn't find the energy to care.

"Actually," Shizuo began thinking aloud, "you should get out of those wet clothes first."

Izaya had to suppress a shudder at the thought of undressing. It only reminded him of the feeling of icy hands pulling at his clothes and the cold air hitting his bare skin.

"I won't look of course," Shizuo added hurriedly, snapping Izaya back to reality, "but it you need help uhh… getting upstairs…"

Izaya briefly thought about the task of pulling himself up those stairs, and when the thought alone was enough to make him want to pass out, he decided that help might not be a bad idea.

That is if he didn't dread the feeling of hands on him even more.

But he didn't even have to give his answer. Shizuo had already held his arm out, looking in the other direction.

"I won't touch you," he mumbled, "but you can use me for support so you don't fall."

Izaya nodded even though Shizuo wasn't looking at him, and took Shizuo's arm. He was utterly humiliated, having to take help from someone like this—especially from Shizuo of all people.

The task of walking was rapidly growing more difficult. As he took the first few steps toward the stairs, he quickly became aware of just how much he was relying on Shizuo to support his weight, but his pride would never break enough to ask to be carried—as much as he wished he could.

One step after another Izaya forced himself up the stairs, pretending his ankle didn't feel like it was broken, and that this warm thing he was tightly grasping wasn't the arm of his enemy.

Finally they reached the top and Izaya instantly removed his grip on Shizuo's arm, shuffling into his room and towards the attached bathroom.

Not surprisingly, Shizuo continued to stay close behind—a fact which Izaya wasn't sure whether he felt more nervous or relieved about. As much as he didn't want Shizuo—or anyone for that matter—to see him right now, he also did not want to be alone to the same degree. To be left alone in this state would be asking for more pain. When an animal is injured, it is more likely to become prey to another. Though it was an extreme example, Orihara Izaya was a man with a lot of enemies. What if those men decided to pursue him? In his current state there was no way he'd be able to fight them off. Shizuo was his only defense as much as he hated to admit it.

"Oi Flea," Shizuo's voice cut through Izaya's thoughts, shifting his focus back to where he was, "you gonna sit down and let me take a look at that ankle or not?"

"Yeah, yeah," Izaya said under his breath as he closed the lid of the toilet and sat down. The sudden removal of weight from his feet was already beginning to give him some relief.

Kneeling down, Shizuo lightly felt around Izaya's ankle, pressing certain spots more than others. Izaya's mind wandered for a moment, vaguely wondering why he wasn't already remarking on his enemy kneeling in front of him. He blamed the fact that Shizuo was being so gentle for that. He'd never known Shizuo to be gentle towards anything let alone to his nemesis of all people. Hell, Izaya didn't even know the brute was _capable_ of touching someone so lightly and carefully as if he might actually care for the person that ankle belonged to.

"As I thought," he said, "it's just sprained. Put some ice on it tonight and it should be fine as long as you keep your weight off of it. Probably didn't do you much good to have walked all the way here on it though…"

"Spare me the hindsight," Izaya began, holding his hand out, "my wallet was cleared out, so I couldn't call a cab. I didn't have much of a choice."

"I could have carried you…" Shizuo mumbled.

Izaya leaned forward, raising an eyebrow for a moment after Shizuo spoke, then leaned back again and laughed. He laughed until it hurt—which of course didn't take too long because of his fatigue—while Shizuo remained on the floor, eyes looking to the side.

"Shizu-chan, you never cease to astound me with the things you come up with!" he said still giggling to himself, "I can see it now! You picking me up like your blushing bride to be, and whisking me away from danger back to our little cottage in the woods!"

"Will you shut up already?!" Shizuo growled, banging his fist against the tile floor with nearly enough force to break it, "I was just saying it would have been better for your ankle!"

"Fine, fine," Izaya said, deciding that an angry Shizuo was detrimental to his health, "now turn around, will you? I'm going to take a shower."

Izaya smiled to himself when Shizuo did as told seemingly without a second thought. What was with the sudden trust? Not that Izaya had any plans to start a fight at the moment, but Shizuo was _always _suspicious of him. Why was tonight so different?

Shrugging it off for now, Izaya stepped behind the frosted glass doors before carefully peeling away his clothing. His clothes were cold and clung to his skin as he gradually wiggled out of them, throwing them over the top of the shower as he did so. He half hoped something would land on Shizuo's head; however, once he got a good look at the stains on his clothes, he decided that probably wouldn't be good for either of them.

When he first turned the water on, even the cold water felt warm on his chilled skin. He gradually adjusted the water until it was as hot as he could stand it before grabbing his body wash and pouring a generous amount into his hands and scrubbing every inch of himself. Sighing lightly to himself, Izaya watched as a mixture of dirt, blood, and traces of semen flowed down the drain causing his lips to curl into a grimace in disgust.

After washing his hair and face, he gave himself one last rinse before deciding to plug the drain and let the tub fill. Izaya liked to take a bath every night before bed whenever he had the time, and tonight nothing sounded better than soaking in the soothing warm water despite already being clean.

He'd almost forgotten about Shizuo until the man spoke up.

"What're you doing?" he asked hesitantly.

"I'm just going to sit in the bath for a while," Izaya responded, "You know you don't have to stay if you don't want to."

"Yeah I know," he said clearly, the next bit however was quiet enough that Izaya had to strain his ears to catch it, "I just wanted to make sure you were okay I guess."

His breath caught in his throat for a moment because there was no way he'd just heard what he thought he heard. Shizuo didn't care about him at all.

_But then why did he follow me home? And insist on checking my injuries…?_

It was all very strange now that his head was beginning to clear up; however, he was still far too tired to really care. For now he preferred to simply enjoy the warmth soaking into his skin and soothing sore muscles. He'd just pretend he didn't hear Shizuo at all for now in favor of letting his head and body rest.

He began to drift off into a relaxed state, but it didn't last for long. When he closed his eyes images began to flash through his head as if his brain didn't want him to be able to relax in peace. He could handle it for a while until the images in his mind became phantom touches that made him begin to feel ill. He could feel a hand on the back of his head holding him still, and hands on his hips pulling him backwards.

Lurching forward as he awakened from his trance, Izaya tried to keep his breathing calm as he reminded himself where he was… and where he wasn't.

"Izaya?" Shizuo questioned, "is everything all right in there?"

Izaya simply nodded before remembering that Shizuo couldn't see him. "I'm just peachy, Shizu-chan!" he called out, deciding that the best way to get through the evening was to put on his usual mask. He felt safer—rather more confident—when he could hide behind his typical façade.

Having Shizuo present was truly rather nerve-wracking for the informant. The man's 'unpredictability' was beginning to become a constant in Izaya's life. Something that would always yield the same response: Shizuo would see him; the chase ensues. That's how it always was. But this strange new behavior was throwing him off. It almost made it more difficult to hide his emotions due to the shock. He didn't know how to react to this version of Shizuo.

This wouldn't do. Heiwajima Shizuo had to leave. Now. Before Izaya inevitably succumbed to his own emotions from the evening. He could feel his defenses slipping, and he wanted—_needed_—Shizuo out before he fell.

Pulling the plug on the drain, Izaya stood up, careful to avoid putting too much weight on his injured ankle. He grabbed the towel hanging over the top of the shower and dried off quickly, wrapping the towel around his waist. He felt a bit exposed having to face Shizuo wearing only a towel, but he could handle it as long as he could get Shizuo to leave quickly.


	4. Chapter 4

Shizuo let out a quiet sigh when Izaya's voice switched back to its typical annoying, overly-giddy tone. He wasn't stupid. He knew Izaya was faking it. Even someone like Izaya could get shaken up from something like that. And as strange as it was, Shizuo was almost relieved at that fact. Izaya's human side was beginning to show through the cracks. The way he had been staring vacantly at the ground earlier, the way he had begrudgingly accepted Shizuo's help up the stairs…

Izaya was caught off guard by those men. They'd likely threatened him at gunpoint. He had probably been in mild shock by the time Shizuo had chased those men away. That would explain why the Flea had been shaking so much when he first stood up.

Resting his head in his hands, Shizuo closed his eyes for a moment, recalling what he'd overheard. Izaya was a bastard, but not even he deserved to be… raped.

Shizuo was snapped out of those thoughts by a sudden movement from the shower. He turned and could see Izaya's silhouette stand up from behind the class and grab the towel hanging up.

When Izaya stepped out of the shower, Shizuo's hands automatically clench into fists.

A brief glance would have sufficed; however, Shizuo found his anger boiling up, not allowing him to simply brush off what he was looking at.

There were bruises, scrapes, and cuts scattered over Izaya's upper body, covering what would normally be smooth, pale skin. But what bothered him the most were the small, round bruises along his hips just above the towel—a tell-tale sign that those injuries were not from any standard street fight.

It set something off deep in Shizuo's mind. The thought of those men touching Izaya like that—hurting him like this. His eyes jumped from each bruise while his mind imagined where each one had come from. From the bit of his knees showing under the towel where he landed when they shoved him to the ground, the finger-sized ones along his shoulders and hips from where they held him, his wrists where the rope was tied much too tight, and his legs where they pinned him to the ground while someone else fucked him.

It was disgusting to think about, and yet he couldn't stop.

"And what are you looking at?" Izaya said sternly, covering some of the bruises as he placed his hands on his hips. Whether or not that was intended to hide them, Shizuo didn't dare try to find out.

Instead Shizuo found himself too baffled to even think of an explanation other than the truth, deciding to ask a different question in response:

"Are you okay?"

He knew he shouldn't really be asking, but it just slipped out.

"I told you, I'm fine," Izaya said, hands remaining in their place.

"Let me look at those injuries for you," once again Shizuo found himself speaking before he could stop himself, "I can help you treat them."

"No," he replied flatly, "you've done enough. I'll be fine on my own, so get out and leave me alone."

"But Izaya—" Shizuo reasoned.

"I said 'no', now go away."

"But are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes. Now go."

Shizuo lowered his voice, "Izaya, I didn't mean physically…"

Shizuo stiffened, immediately knowing he shouldn't have said anything else. Before Izaya even opened his mouth Shizuo could tell he'd struck a nerve.

Izaya's eyes widened for a brief moment before his gaze turned dark.

"Shizuo," Izaya's voice was almost a whisper, his bangs hiding half of his face, "Get. Out."

He knew he should move, but instead he found himself frozen on the spot. Something wasn't right. Izaya was slipping.

"I SAID GET THE FUCK OUT!" Izaya screamed, turning Shizuo and shoving him towards the door, "I don't want you here! Now LEAVE."

Shizuo was pushed to the door of Izaya's bedroom before he suddenly stopped in his tracks, Izaya still struggling to keep him moving. By the time he turned around Izaya had already given up and grabbed a knife—different from his usual one, Shizuo noted—from the top of his dresser and had it pointed at him.

"Izaya," Shizuo warned, "I don't want to fight you right now."

He'd never seen Izaya like this before. He was breathing heavily, looking as if he was ready to drive that blade in to Shizuo's chest. Not to mention he'd never heard Izaya raise his voice like that. Something was very wrong with the informant and Shizuo knew the man would never admit it if he were to leave now.

Deciding there was no other way to solve this, Shizuo acted fast, grabbing Izaya's wrist and forcing the knife from his hand.

Izaya struggled, pulling at Shizuo's hand, trying to pry it away.

"Let me go!"

Shizuo didn't wait for things to escalate any further. Holding back just enough, Shizuo used the back of his free hand to strike Izaya's cheek.

Instantly Izaya froze, blinking a few times, apparently not quite sure what had just happened.

"I don't plan on leaving until I know that you're okay, and frankly, freaking out like that isn't helping your chances," Shizuo spoke as calmly as he could though he couldn't help feeling rather agitated by Izaya's vehement denial that he might need someone's help.

Shizuo paused, and when Izaya didn't respond, he continued on.

"I'll only ask this one more time, and if you still give me the same answer, then fine. I'll leave you here. _Alone_," Shizuo said, noticing the emphasis on the word "alone" seemed to make Izaya grow slightly more tense, "Now tell me; Are you okay?"

Izaya hesitated, leaving Shizuo to wait and take notice of how uncomfortable Izaya looked. His body was tense as his arms wrapped around his waist in something like a self-hug, and before Shizuo could even react, Izaya went down, falling to his knees while his hands move from his waist to hold his trembling shoulders.

"Izaya," Shizuo found himself whispering that name in a soft tone he'd never used towards the informant—or possibly to anyone—before.

Kneeling down as well, Shizuo tried to get a glimpse of Izaya's face; however, Izaya simply turned away. Cautiously, Shizuo reached out to place his hand on Izaya's shoulder only for the informant to flinch away before shrinking into himself even more as if he was trying to make himself so small that he'd simply disappear.

"Izaya, I'm not trying to hurt you," he whispered, "I want to help you. You know, it's okay to be upset."

There was still no real response from Izaya other than seeming to accept that the hand on his shoulder wasn't going to harm him right now.

…~-~…

Izaya couldn't think.

All he knew was that he was breaking and if Shizuo didn't take his damn hands off of him, he was going to shatter—right there, in front of his nemesis.

He could feel the tremors in his body, but that was not his top priority at the moment. What caught his attention more was the tell-tale sting in his eyes of oncoming tears. He fought them back, and nearly succeeded until Shizuo's hand moved, lightly running down his back.

"It's okay," Shizuo repeated, "it's bad for you to hold it in."

Izaya bit his lip. He refused to let anyone see him cry—especially Shizuo.

"It's okay, Izaya."

But damn it if that idiot didn't shut up—!

"It's okay."

Tears built up in his eyes, but Izaya blinked them away.

But when Shizuo came closer and wrapped his arms around Izaya's shoulders, he couldn't take it anymore.

The pressure built up and before he knew it, tears had began streaking down his cheeks and a few small sobs escaped his lips, his small frame shaking more violently with each breath.

Shizuo fell silent, simply continuing to stroke Izaya's hair as his true emotions finally surfaced. When he realized he couldn't stop, Izaya turned to hide his face in Shizuo's shoulder. The onslaught of tears only increasing as Shizuo merely held him silently.

He shuddered when the images began to flash through his mind once more. Those hands on him—touching him… the feeling of the first one pushing inside of him…

He suddenly felt nauseous, and acutely aware that the taste of semen had not completely gone away—until gentle fingers worked their way into his hair and Shizuo pulled him in closer to his warm body.

It was impossible for Izaya to even begin to imagine why Shizuo was helping him like this, so instead he chose to accept being pulled into that comforting warmth without question.

No one had held him like this before—save for his mother when he had been a child. However, since then he'd never allowed anyone to see his emotions like this. It made him feel too vulnerable… too _human._ Yet he still allowed Shizuo to hold him while he let out those feelings he had planned on keeping inside until the blond left.

But he didn't want to be alone. Not right now. Yes, he wanted Shizuo gone, but he didn't want to be alone either. And just the thought that maybe he was happy that Shizuo was here right now made him even more terrified.

And so he took himself away from his thoughts. Instead of thinking about who was here, he focused on the feeling of security, and the soothing brush of fingertips in his hair. He closed his eyes and let his shoulders droop as he gradually stopped shaking.

For about five minutes, Izaya forgot who he was.

…~-~…

**Sorry for the delay! The next chapter might be a bit longer to finish because I'm lacking motivation but I'll have it done eventually!**

**Thank you for the favorites and reviews! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Shorter update is better than no update! **

…~-~…

Izaya's hair was much softer than he'd imagined it would be. It was still a bit damp from his shower, but it was dry enough that Shizuo could easily run his fingers through and feel the softness.

Shizuo knew that Izaya had been holding back. Even now he could tell Izaya was still trying to hold back, which was why Shizuo refused to let go. He wouldn't be satisfied until Izaya accepted his help—even if it was just to be a shoulder to cry on.

He couldn't bare thinking about what those men had done to Izaya—his Izaya.

His grip tightened even as Izaya's breathing began to even out again, and the tears slowly came to a stop. Shizuo wondered what Izaya was thinking about as he moved his hand to lightly rub the back of his neck.

Despite the circumstances, it felt nice to finally be able to hold Izaya like this. Even if the man was only accepting his help to eventually get rid of him.

With a small sigh, Shizuo absentmindedly ran his hand down Izaya's spine, feeling each bump protruding from his thin frame. When Izaya shifted at the touch Shizuo realized he must have gone a bit too low for comfort, quickly retracting his hand back to the smaller man's neck.

"Hey, where are your pajamas?" Shizuo whispered. Izaya was still only wearing a towel and was likely getting too cold despite the fact that he was still running a slight fever.

"I can get that myself," Izaya said, slowly moving to pull himself to his feet.

Shizuo helped Izaya when he wavered a bit, but let him go to the dresser on his own allowing Izaya to at least keep a bit of his pride intact.

Much to Shizuo's surprise Izaya let the towel fall to the ground without a word to Shizuo as he pulled his clothes from the drawer.

A blush instantly covered Shizuo's face and he was about to turn away, yet his eyes lingered on Izaya for a brief moment, admiring the informant's well-proportioned body before he managed to tear his gaze away.

"Jeeze, how about a warning?" he said.

Izaya didn't respond as he slipped on clean boxers, black shorts, and a grey hoodie.

Shizuo had already seen him cry. To Izaya there was no difference between that and being completely nude; therefore, he really didn't care if Shizuo saw him naked now.

Carefully limping into the bathroom, Izaya grabbed his toothbrush and mouthwash, determined to get that wretched taste out of his mouth. When Shizuo approached him again, Izaya accepted his arm without a word.

The pain in his ankle—and everywhere else for that matter—was getting much worse with every minute that passed.

Climbing to his bed, Izaya collapsed into the sheets, burying his face in his pillow and letting out a low groan. His bed and dry clothes had never felt so comfortable as he shifted in bed, relishing the feeling of soft, warm fabric against his skin.

His enjoyment was interrupted when Shizuo lightly cleared his throat.

"Well, I said I'd leave once I knew you were okay, so…" he trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck, "I guess I'll… see you around."

Izaya nodded in reply, unsure of how he should respond. What would happen the next time they saw each other? Would they fight like usual?

_That's not important. Just forget about it and sleep, _he told himself.

…~-~…

The rain had finally stopped when Shizuo left the apartment building, but the streets were still fairly empty. It was late, and only the night owls continued to prowl the streets at this hour.

_Probably the same types of people who would rape someone in an alley_, he thought with disgust.

He still wasn't sure how to feel at the moment. There was an odd combination of anger and calmness in him as we walked that he had never felt before.

Part of him wanted nothing more than to track those men down and destroy them for what they did, but he knew that wouldn't solve anything in the end. People like that didn't learn to change overnight from being beaten half to death, and even if they did, it wouldn't fix the damage that had already been done to Izaya. The only thing that fighting would do is land him in prison.

Shizuo stopped at a nearby park bench, deciding not to sit when he remembered the rain, choosing instead to lean against the lamppost next to it.

Closing his eyes only allowed him to envision Izaya's bruised body easier. Lighting a cigarette to help calm himself, Shizuo stood there for a few minutes to think.

About Izaya, about what had happened to him, and about how Izaya had reacted to the whole thing. There was no doubt that he had been intentionally playing it off as less severe than it was. Those men had raped him at gunpoint and all he could say was that he was fine?!

Pausing, Shizuo sighed when he realized he had broken the cigarette between his fingers.

And why was it that even _that_ reminded him of Izaya?!

He simply couldn't quell the felling that something just wasn't right. The feeling that Izaya really wasn't going to be okay this time.

Standing up straight, Shizuo prepared himself to head back to check on Izaya when his phone alerted him to a new text message.

"[Come back.]"

It was a simple message, but it held so much. Izaya would never ask for help like this—at least not so blatantly.

Closing his phone with nearly enough force to break it, Shizuo quickly headed back to Izaya's apartment, unsure of what state he might find Izaya in when he got there.


	6. Chapter 6

Sleeping was proving to be rather difficult for Izaya despite being entirely exhausted. The various aches and pains as well as the images and memories that came with each individual pain kept him tossing and turning under the covers, his body seeking a comfortable position. Not to mention the noises he heard from his bed which he wasn't sure were real or just in his head.

For once in his life, Izaya was truly afraid to be alone.

How could this happen? How could those men have driven him to _this_?

To make him actually fear the normal sounds of his apartment, to make him feel this kind of pain and humiliation…

To make him break down in front of Shizuo.

That was probably the worst of it all, he decided. And what was with Shizuo tonight anyway? Why was he so adamant about not leaving earlier? The whole thing struck him as odd. Why in the world was Shizuo acting so strange?!

A creak from the building made Izaya jolt out of his thoughts before mentally slapping himself for being so terrified. He heard these noises every night. The only thing that was different was that he was no longer thinking logically about them.

Ahh, yes. Fear had that effect on most people. However Izaya didn't classify himself as "most people". Yes, he was raped, but it's over now and he needed to rest. Yet for some reason his mind couldn't stop dwelling on the emotions he had felt when those men had caught him.

Izaya had mastered the ability to mask his true thoughts and feelings. It was a skill necessary for the type of work he did. Those who lacked this ability would find themselves rapidly becoming victims to the ruthlessness that was the underworld of the city.

The moments in which Izaya's mask slipped were few and far between, yet tonight he couldn't seem to keep it together.

_This is all _his_ fault, _Izaya thought.

If Shizuo had just left him alone, maybe he wouldn't feel so miserable.

But then again, if Shizuo had left him alone, he might not have made it home alive…

Thoughts continued to conflict in Izaya's mind as everything grew less and less clear to him. His thoughts were an unorganized mess as he jumped from thought to thought so fast that the logical side of his mind could not keep up.

His heart raced as his thoughts grew more and more frantic.

Those hands all over him.

Accepting Shizuo's help.

Pain.

Jeering voices.

Why did Shizuo save him?

Where would he be if Shizuo hadn't shown up?

Back to those hands on him, and the pain.

Shizuo's strange behavior.

Breaking down and crying on Shizuo's shoulder.

Would those men come looking for him again tonight?

Could he defend himself if they did?

Fear.

All of his thoughts fed his steadily growing fear.

And it was that feeling of fear that had him reaching for his phone and sending a text to the man he has fought with for eight years.

"[Come back]"

Setting the phone back, Izaya covered his head with his pillow, ashamed about what he was asking.

But if Shizuo really was willing to help like he said he was, then Izaya was going to have to just accept that because he couldn't stand being here alone any longer.

He hid under his pillow for what seemed like hours until the sound of his phone vibrating on the nightstand nearly made him jump out of his skin, the hairs on the back of his neck standing up from the sudden noise.

Glancing at the clock, Izaya noticed it had only been about fifteen minutes since he'd sent the text.

"Hello?" Izaya answered the call immediately upon seeing Shizuo's name on the caller ID.

"Hey, I'm here but the door is locked," Shizuo's voice sounded very soft with just a hint of irritation that brought a sense of familiarity to Izaya's scattered thoughts.

"Ah," Izaya responded, happy that the blond had locked the door for him in the first place.

"I can uhh… break it down if you can't get up,"

"That won't be necessary," Izaya replied. The last thing he wanted as to have the door broken all night. "Just give me a minute."

A strained sigh left him as he shifted to sit up, making the pain flare up again. With careful movements, Izaya managed to get to his feet, hissing when his ankle took some of his weight.

Limping out of the room, Izaya made it to the stairs and held the railing tightly so he could support most of his weight to keep himself from collapsing down the stairs.

After what was likely a good three to five minutes, Izaya finally made it to the door, panting. He silently stepped to the side to allow Shizuo inside, his eyes pointed focused on the ground.

"So, what's up?" Shizuo asked, hesitating to remove his shoes.

_Don't make me say it you dumb brute, _he thought.

"Well," Izaya began, slipping his mask on the best he could and summoning the courage to look Shizuo in the eye, "originally I called you back here because you never got an icepack for me, but I suppose having to get the door anyway sort of makes the whole thing irrelevant."

"Right," Shizuo sighed, rolling his eyes, "that's the only reason?"

"Yes," Izaya lied.

"Alright then," Shizuo began with a glint in his eyes that made Izaya instinctively take a step back, "I guess I shouldn't make you suffer anymore then, should I?"

Izaya was backed into a corner as Shizuo came towards him.

_This was a huge mistake. _

Every one of Izaya's muscles tensed as Shizuo continued towards him. His eyes automatically closed when he saw Shizuo's hands reaching for him.

He gasped when he felt an arm at his legs swoop under him, taking him off his feet—only instead of hitting the ground, he fell backwards into Shizuo's other arm and was lifted off the ground.

"H-hey!" Izaya protested, "What do you think you're doing?!"

"Calm down already," Shizuo said in response to Izaya's struggling, "I'm just carrying you back upstairs, okay?"

"No, it's _not_ okay! You could at least warn me before you try something like that!"

"And would you have let me if I _did_ ask first?"

"Of course not!" Izaya responded. They were at the stairs now and Izaya's heart was beating faster than ever.

Izaya craved control, and having Shizuo suddenly pick him up like this made him unable to choose where he was going.

"Put me down, you idiot!" Izaya said, pounding his fist against Shizuo's chest, but the man refused to yield.

Izaya stopped struggling when Shizuo only smiled in response. Not the smile drenched in anger that he usually received from the blond, but a gentle smile that sent a shiver down Izaya's spine.

_What does he think he's doing smiling like that?_

Closing his eyes, Izaya tried to will away the ache steadily forming in his head. Really, Shizuo's strange behavior was going to destroy him.

Perhaps calling him back wasn't such a great idea.

…~-~…

**Quick note: according to my original plan, this fic only has about 2 chapters left. However since it got a lot more popular than I anticipated, and I know you'll all be mad at me if I end it the way I plan to, I am considering writing a sequel. I'll make another note when I decide what I am going to do officially. **


	7. Chapter 7

"Okay, so where do you keep your ice pack?" Shizuo asked as he set a now quiet and motionless Izaya back into bed.

"Under the bathroom sink downstairs," Izaya mumbled, "I trust your tiny brain can figure out where to find the ice."

To Izaya's mild surprise, Shizuo only waved over his shoulder in response as he left the room. Usually a comment like that would have at least earned him a "shut up, flea" or something.

Izaya let out a frustrated groan and pulled at his hair. He didn't know what was going on, and it was a terribly unsettling feeling. He turned on his side seeing as it was the most comfortable position he could find at the moment and took a deep breath.

He needed to calm down. The last thing he needed was another break down.

However…

Izaya couldn't deny that he had felt a weight lifted from his chest after crying earlier. Though it did nothing for his conflicting thoughts, he had to admit it was nice to have someone hold him for once. As long as he didn't think about _who_ it was. And unfortunately, all he could find himself thinking now was how much he wanted to feel that relief again.

He was still attempting to gather the right words in his head when Shizuo walked back in, ice pack in hand.

"There," Shizuo said under his breath as he placed the ice on Izaya's ankle, "so is that all you needed then?"

Damn it. The idiot was going to make him say it, wasn't he?

"If that's it, then I guess I'll go," the blond said with a shrug, turning to leave.

Izaya desperately struggled to find the words to tell Shizuo "don't go" but the syllables wouldn't form on his lips. His vision blurred for a moment when his heart rate suddenly picked up, making him dizzy.

_Wait. Don't leave me here alone,_ His mind screamed as he watched Shizuo take a few steps towards the door.

There was a hand in front of him. It took him a moment to realize it was his own, and that at some point he had lifted it to reach out to Shizuo—his body subconsciously trying to convey the message he somehow couldn't speak out loud.

It was only then that he realized he was panicking. It must have been some sort of instinct that caused him to reach for Shizuo like that. He let his hand drop when his mind finally registered how desperate the act must look to Shizuo when the blond turned around.

"You could just tell me to stay, Flea," he said with a sigh.

Lowering his head, Izaya wished he knew why he _couldn't_ just say it.

"Hey, don't beat yourself up over it," Shizuo said, moving to sit on the edge of the bed, "It's normal to be a bit shaken up by something like that."

"I told you I'm fine," Izaya insisted, finally finding his voice.

"Were you scared?"

"Tch. No."

"Then what was that all about earlier, huh?" Shizuo pressed, "People don't just cry over nothi—woah!"

Shizuo had to raise his hand to catch the fist that came flying towards his face before he could even finish his sentence. His eyes met Izaya's, which were filled with that same rage as earlier.

Izaya was breathing heavily as Shizuo's hand closed around his fist and forced him to lower his arm. He hadn't been thinking when he threw that punch. He just didn't want to hear another word of that thought.

"Sorry," Shizuo said quietly.

"Why do you care anyway?" Izaya asked, pulling his hand back.

"I have my reasons."

"Any those reasons are…?"

"I don't have to tell you that. You're not the only one allowed to dodge questions."

"But I answered you!" Izaya said as he replaced the ice on his ankle.

"Not truthfully," Shizuo stated.

"Wh-what?"

"You heard me."

"All I want to know is what the hell is going through that thick skull of yours to make you think that helping me is a good idea!"

"Then answer my question."

"Which one?"

"Were you scared?"

Izaya's mouth dropped open when he realized this conversation was going in circles.

"Shizu-chan I—"

"Just answer the question or I'll leave right now."

"Hey! Shizu-chan, wait!" Izaya said as Shizuo stood to leave.

Once again Izaya felt his heart race as Shizuo began to leave.

He didn't want to be left alone.

Not now.

Please.

Shizu-chan.

"Yes," Izaya said quietly, his voice shaking from the strain of admitting his defeat, "I was scared. Are you happy now?"

"No," Shizuo turned around.

"I… Wh-what? Shizu-chan?"

Izaya felt like his brain had reached the status of total meltdown.

Shizuo sighed at the look of hopeless confusion on Izaya's face—a look that not many got the chance to see.

"Let me re-phrase that," he said sitting back down, "I guess I'm happy you told the truth, but the truth doesn't make me happy to hear."

"That makes even less sense," Izaya responded holding his head in his hands. Really, this guy's logic was strange, "I thought you'd be happy to see me like this. You should be throwing a party by now! Orihara Izaya was taken down by some nasty yakuza members! Someone go buy a cake so we can celebrate!"

"Izaya…" Shizuo said quietly.

"You know what? If you're going to keep acting so strange like this then I really don't want you here. Maybe I'll call Shinra or Namie or… or…" he trailed off when he realized he couldn't think of anyone else. And even those two options made him want to cringe.

"Would you just shut up for a minute and let me talk?!"

Izaya did just that, afraid that ignoring the blond's wishes could lead to a beating his body couldn't handle.

"Listen," he began, "I know you have your pride and all of that shit that makes it so you won't tell people what you're feeling, but sometimes you just have to say 'fuck it' and let people help you! I saw what happened! You were _raped_ Izaya! If you can just dust yourself off like nothing happened then maybe I have bigger things to worry about than your physical well-being!"

At the use of the word "rape", Shizuo noticed Izaya flinch but had kept talking because he knew he was finally getting something close to a normal reaction at least.

"I don't understand," Izaya replied, "Shizuo, _why_?"

"Because I—" Shizuo cut himself off.

"Because _what_?" Izaya pressed.

"Because… Because what they did to you is just fucked up, and not even you deserve that!"

Izaya had no response other than to stare silently at the blond. He never imagined Shizuo could show sympathy for the person he claimed to kill every day since entering high school—no matter what happened to him.

"So how long were you planning on having me stay?" Shizuo asked after a few minutes of silence, "Because I don't have a change of clothes with me or anything."

"I have a pair of sweatpants and a shirt that are a bit big on me." Izaya mumbled in response.

After directing Shizuo to the proper drawer, Izaya turned away to let Shizuo change. Shizuo then proceeded to make himself comfortable on the other side of the bed while Izaya glanced at the clock.

3:43 AM.

"Hey," Shizuo said calmly, "You're the one who wanted me to be here, so whatever you want to say or do, just do it and get it over with or else this is gonna be a hell of a lot more awkward for both of us."

"Right…" Izaya said with a chuckle.

What _did_ he want?

Just for someone to be here? Or did he want more?

Despite the interrogation, his stress levels had already decreased significantly since Shizuo arrived at the door, but he also wanted…

He wanted to feel what he'd felt earlier.

Just for a few more minutes. Then he'd be fine and be able to get some sleep.

Inching closer Izaya sighed as he made his choice.

"Just deal with this for a little while," he said, lying down and resting his head on Shizuo's chest.

He could hear the man's heart rate increase, yet he managed to keep a calm exterior—something that Izaya saw as a real accomplishment for the blond.

"Is this okay?" Izaya asked.

"It's fine," he replied with a small shrug.

They were still for a few minutes during which Izaya's mind finally stopped racing, and his breathing was able to even out. He didn't even react—or rather didn't even realize he _should_ have reacted—when he felt Shizuo's arm wrap around his back and his hand rest on Izaya's waist.

"Is _this_ okay?" Shizuo repeated Izaya's question back to him.

Izaya nodded in reply rather than telling the blond that it was more than okay when the action made him feel the safest he'd felt since he started work as an informant.

It was only two minutes after closing his eyes that Izaya drifted off into a calm sleep.

…~-~…

Shizuo watched with a smile as "a little while" became ten minutes, then twenty, then thirty. Izaya's breathing had evened out long ago, signifying that he had fallen asleep and Shizuo didn't have the heart to wake him—even if this position was starting to hurt his shoulder.

He could handle it. It was all worth it to be able to be with Izaya like this. Even though he couldn't see the informant's face fully, the feeling of his breath leaving a warm patch with every exhale and the feeling of his body breathing calmly was enough for now. Besides, if he could easily reach Izaya's face right now he might be too… tempted.

So he stayed awake as long as he could, enjoying finally being able to lie with another person, even if it was only for one night.

When Shizuo finally fell asleep, he dreamed that he and Izaya spent the whole next day lying like this.

…~-~…

**Finally. New chapter. **

**This fic will be ending very soon, possibly the next chapter, and if I think of what I want to do to continue it, I will make a separate fic as a sequel and maybe make a chapter update to alert people through email that the sequel is started. (again, assuming I actually do it. It's about 65% chance that I will at the moment, but it'll take a while to work it all out.) **

**As always, thanks for reading and reviewing! :D**


	8. Chapter 8

**Honestly still not sure about that sequel. I start classes again in two weeks so it'll be a while before that gets all planned out properly if I decide to go through with it.**

**I'll try to keep things updated on both of my tumblr accounts (which you can find on my profile page). Feel free to contact me about the status of this decision on tumblr. But for now, this is the last chapter. Thank you for reading! **

…~-~…

Shizuo woke to the sun shining through the window and a light shifting of the man lying on his chest. Izaya had curled up in his sleep and was pressing even closer to Shizuo than when he'd first fallen asleep. The new position also allowed Shizuo to get a better view of Izaya's face, only a few inches from his own.

With all defenses dropped, Izaya's face relaxed to a peaceful expression that threw Shizuo off at first glance. He had to take a moment to remind himself that this was still Izaya and despite the look on his sleeping face, the man was still potentially dangerous.

Izaya shifted once again, and a light smile began to show itself on the informants face as his body pressed against Shizuo even more.

_Shit, how can a guy like him be so damn cute? _Shizuo thought.

The temptation to quickly press his lips to Izaya's was growing stronger with every second he looked at the sleeping informant, forcing Shizuo to abruptly look away when he caught himself moving closer.

The movement must have been too sudden. Shizuo cursed himself when he saw Izaya's eyes flutter open, and widen in shock when he seemed to remember what had happened.

Izaya quickly pushed himself away from the blond and sat up, eyes darting from Shizuo, to the sun coming through the window, to his alarm clock, and finally resting on his own hands.

"Good morning," Shizuo said quietly to try to ease the tension in the room.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" Izaya asked.

"Dunno," Shizuo lied as he moved out of the position he'd held through the night, "I guess I fell asleep too so I didn't think to bother waking you."

Something pulled in Shizuo's chest when Izaya's only response was to grimace and turn away. Was Izaya still going to challenge him about all of this?

Stupid question. This was Izaya after all.

"Thanks."

Or not. Did he hear that right? Or was his mind playing tricks on him?

Izaya made eye contact for the first time this morning before continuing.

"For letting me sleep like that, I mean," he paused, "and for saving me as well, I suppose."

So he wasn't hearing things. Izaya had really just thanked him. He wasn't too sure how to respond since he'd never heard Izaya seriously thank anyone before—nor was a "thank you" directed at him often.

The painful tug he'd felt moments ago was replaced with a warm feeling in his chest. He'd done something right, and made someone feel better rather than hurting them.

"What the hell are you smiling at?" Izaya asked, snapping Shizuo out of his thoughts.

"Ahh, nothing, sorry," Shizuo responded hurriedly.

…~-~…

Aside from Izaya asking what Shizuo wanted on his omelet, neither of them spoke for the next hour. A heavy tension left in the air as they both attempted to grasp the concept that this was all really happening—and that the two had just spent the night in the same room without attempting to kill each other.

They finished breakfast still unable to think of what to say to one another even as Izaya picked up both dishes and set them in the sink.

It was the only way he felt he could escape the situation, and though he was fully aware that Shizuo could still see him from where he was seated, Izaya hung his head and sighed as he tried to collect himself.

But apparently, Shizuo wasn't going to give him that chance.

"So are we just going to pretend nothing happened?" he asked, sounding irate.

"I would appreciate it if we did, yes," Izaya replied in a quiet voice. This conversation was giving him a headache already.

"Okay, so what now? I leave and everything goes back to normal?"

"What part of 'yes' don't you understand, Shizu-chan?"

"I think it's the part where I can't actually _do_ that!" Shizuo exclaimed, "Maybe you can just turn your back to the facts, but not everyone is like you!"

"So what is it that you want?" Izaya said, taking a few steps out of the kitchen. He was beginning to feel trapped in there.

Shizuo merely stared at Izaya for a moment. There were plenty of things he wanted at the moment, and one of them was for Izaya to drop the act and stop hiding behind that cold exterior. But instead all he could say was:

"I know that I _don't_ want to go back to the way things were!"

"Shizu-chan," Izaya said with a sigh, "how can you possibly think that what happened last night will change things between us?"

"How couldn't it?!" Shizuo blurted out, "You're more fucked up than I thought if last night meant nothing to you!"

"What do you mean by that?"

"You cried on my shoulder! Literally!"

Shizuo's jaw dropped slightly when Izaya's eyes widened almost as if he was hearing about this for the first time. Aside from shock, there was another emotion flickering in Izaya's eyes before he closed them.

Shame.

He knew that look on anyone. Izaya was ashamed.

"Just drop it, Shizuo," Izaya said in a low voice.

"I mean it though," he continued, "I really want to help you through this. And… maybe end the fighting as well…"

Though the last bit was mumbled, the sudden dropping of Izaya's shoulders and his next words signified he'd heard clearly.

"Why?" he asked simply.

"Because I just don't want to do it anymore," Shizuo's heart was racing and his palms began to sweat as he continued, "I want to try to work things out between the two of us."

Izaya opened his mouth to respond when the front door clicked and opened.

Shizuo spun around to see a young woman with long brown hair and her head held high walk through the door.

"You're lucky I'm even coming in today," she said coldly, "Seiji and that girl are going to the beach and I wanted to follow but he was hell-bent on being alone with her and—"

Namie cut herself off when she finally walked far enough into the room to notice the blond standing off to the side.

"Ahh, Namie," Izaya said, snapping back into his mask once again, "I'm glad you're here! There's a lot to do today!"

"Am I interrupting your being murdered?" Namie asked looking between the two, "Because if so, I hope you have your finances in order. I still need to be paid this week."

"No, no, Shizu-chan and I were just having a little chat, right Shizu-chan?"

"Uhh, yeah…" Shizuo said, deciding to play along for the moment.

"Whatever, just leave me out of it," she said slipping between them to her desk.

Shizuo looked back to Izaya to see him nodding his head towards the door.

"No problem Namie-san, we're done here anyway."

Shizuo was about to protest as Izaya began pushing him towards the door until Izaya spoke again, much more quietly.

"So what was your plan to make all of this happen?" he asked.

"Not sure," Shizuo replied, "Wanna maybe catch a movie later?"

Izaya nodded.

"Okay."

…~-~…

**The End. **

**(Remember when I said you'd all hate the ending I had in mind for this? Well there you go. Sorry not sorry.)**

**Thank you so much for everything! I hope you enjoyed reading! **


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